My Subjective Reality Experiment: The Ultimate Realization

It’s been nearly 6 weeks since I began my subjective reality experiment. To be honest, I haven’t been fully submersing myself in the moment to moment question of “if everyone and everything around me is a reflection of me, what does it say about me?”. It’s a hard shift for my mind to make and to keep there, but I have come up with quite a few interesting reality checks, the most interesting of all is the last life changing event to occur in my life: the birth of my wife’s and my first child, a baby son!

A month and half ago, I decided to venture into the mindset of seeing the world through a subjective reality lens after being inspired by the experiments of a popular personal development blogger, Steve Pavlina (www.stevepavlina.com). Subjective reality is assuming that everything around you is a creation of your consciousness. There is no exception, not the good nor the bad. You create everything, everyone and every single interaction you have. Objective reality is seeing the world as separate from you: you are an independent being moving through a world of unrelated events, people, circumstances. You are a lone ranger-scientist manipulating a world of uncontrolled variables.

In my last blog to you I mentioned that I was approaching two problems with the subjective reality mindset: the vindictive neighbor and the invading ants (reread the article here). Here’s what happened:

THE VINDICTIVE NEIGHBOR

After an angry neighbor tore down our yoga class signs that we posted around our community, I decided to see her as an extension of my consciousness rather than through an objective lens: a conniving, separate-from-me, human being whose purpose was to make my life miserable by thwarting my yoga advertising efforts. Instead I focused on seeing what her actions represented in me, if she was indeed a part of me. I began to see that her pettiness was my pettiness, her vindictiveness was my vindictiveness, and her unruly self-righteousness was my unruly self-righteousness. None of this was flattering, but I decided to heal the situation, not by confronting her or by posting more signs, but by sending thoughts of “I love you” to her, which in a subjective world, is really me sending thoughts of love to myself.

The result was that I never saw her face again in the neighborhood until just last week, despite the fact that I walk the dog twice a day and I know that she gets out for her morning walk every day also. It was almost as if her existence simply vanished from my consciousness. There’s been no further conflict, and our yoga classes continue to fill up.

THE CASE OF THE INVADING ANTS

After waking one morning to discover that ants had taken over our kitchen counters and sinks, I decided to solve the invasion with a subjective reality approach, instead of with a can of Raid. My wife Jaime and I talked about how the ants represented our lack of accountability. The ants came supposedly because we didn’t always do the dishes right away, or put the food away on the counter, but they came also because we didn’t always pay the bills on time, or that we procrastinated with some of business efforts, like finding distributors for our instructional DVDs. We then created a concrete plan to make sure we were more accountable in all areas of our lives, like doing the dishes more frequently, and starting an application for a potential DVD distributor.

The result was amazing. I didn’t see another ant in our kitchen for three weeks. Previously, even if we had kept the counters and sink clean, there would always be one or two ants roaming about. We didn’t see any ants until one day we mistakenly left out the maple syrup. They came back in droves for a day or two and then disappeared again.

THE REBEL IN THE YOGA CLASS

I’ve had a few other epiphanies along the way. During the month of August I was taking quite a few hot yoga classes, the type of yoga you do in a heated room to increase your flexibility and sweat out toxins. It’s a greatly beneficial form of yoga and exercise but the one thing that I don’t like about it is the fact that the class is highly regimented and that there’s really no deviation allowed from the established routine or positions. Since I like to create movement and am an independent thinker, showing up at class became increasingly more difficult.

As I took more classes, I found myself becoming increasingly irritable with the rigid system. I would find myself resisting the teachers’ instructions or would feel rebellious. Imagine that – a rebel at a yoga class! How funny yet misplaced.

The part of the class that I didn’t like was the rigidity, the formality, the unbending systemized sequence of movements, speech, and breath. It was becoming a tight, unforgiving experience, where I would be lightly reprimanded for not straightening my knee enough, turning my head to the wrong side, or – God forbid – yawning. It was beginning to drive me bonkers.

That’s when my subjective reality filter kicked in. If the yoga class was really me, then what part of me did it represent?

It represented the part of me that was unyielding, unforgiving, systematic, and rigid. And though nobody likes to lay claim to undesirable attributes, my subjective reality filter was telling me that I was all of these characteristics and had probably subjected others to actions of non-forgiveness or rigidity in the past.

These realization lay the foundation for me to exercise flexibility, calmness, and patience for my next epiphany, and the ultimate realization in subjective reality: the birth of my son.

THE ULTIMATE REALIZATION: THE BIRTH OF OUR SON

Our son, Satori Tiger Tam, arrived on August 31, weighing in 6 pounds, 5 ounces. There’s no joy like seeing his face illuminate with satisfaction after a feeding, and there’s no anguish like hearing him cry at night because he has gas in his tummy. The range of emotion is off the charts. I am overwhelmed by the powerful instinct to love, protect and serve, and humbled by the miracle of birth and life. We posted pictures and videos for you and a section for you to leave a comment if you’d like at www.satoritam.com.

Through the days of pre-contraction labor and childbirth, my world became suspended in a bubble of doctors, baby, bottles, and diapers. Was it normal for the baby to spit up? Did we need the vitamin K shot for blood clotting? How do we breast feed? How often do we change his diaper? It was a learning curve like no other.

When the dust settled (somewhat) and we were back at home away from the blinking hospital lights, nurses, and exams, I finally asked myself the question: what part of me does Satori represent? I was astounded by the answer.

He doesn’t represent me. He is me. He is from both of his parents in every way – biologically, genetically, psychologically, spiritually. He is me… and I am him.

Suddenly, I had found an example where I could not deny its validity from either a subjective reality or an objective reality viewpoint. Objectively, he is me. He carries my DNA, adopts my behavioral patterns, and even looks like me. Subjectively, he doesn’t just represent a part of me anymore, he is me. When I see the frustration on his face from hunger, I see my own frustration. When I see his content eyes gaze up at me, I see  my eyes peering forth with love. He is a living, breathing mirror of me.

Objectively, from my wife’s standpoint, he is even more of her than me. She birthed him; he came from her physically. The lines between objective and subjective reality become blurred. Through both reality filters our son does not only represent a part of us, but is us.

So the final realization is that since we are all born of our mothers, and that, despite the fact that we are billions of human beings on the planet, we can trace our roots back to a small group of early ancestors. In that sense, we all come from the same common pool of genetic and biological material. From an objective standpoint, we are each other, and science and logic can prove it so.

From a subjective reality filter, we say that everything is a representation of our consciousness. But with my child in hand, I realize that representation is still a term too distant. It’s important to ask what part of me is this circumstance, person, or thing? My child is me, and I am him. There is no separation or symbolism. The liaison is concrete, factual, real.

I can begin to deepen my understanding now of living life through a filter of subjective reality by asking how everything around me is me, not how everything represents a part of me. It’s a subtle but important shift in mindset, a minor angle change of the paradigm, but so incredibly more accurate, rewarding, and eye-opening. There is greater power and depth in living in a world of “is” rather than a world of “represents”.

I don’t know if I’ll always be able to stay in a world of subjective viewpoint with Satori. In the middle of the night, when I’m changing his diaper for the third time, I find myself slipping into a world of me separated from him. How can you poo so many times in three hours? How can you be so hungry, we just fed you!? The test of mind shift comes not when there is joy, contentment, and relaxation in his face, for those are easy qualities to claim as parts of me. It’s when he’s fussy or frustrated that I need to ask myself how is he being me, and remind myself that he, like everything around me, is a creation of my consciousness.

Since the adventure of raising a child has only just begun for us, I am sure that I’ll be waffling back and forth between objective and subjective reality with him for a long time, until perhaps it will become a fully integrated behavior and I will stop living life in the objective world. It will be important for me to never forget the obvious truth – that he is me – and apply that simple maxim to trying times ahead, as well as of course the beautiful, loving, and rewarding moments also. He is me, I am him, you are me, and I am you. Simple, so challenging, and yet so ever rewarding.

- Alvin.

My Subjective Reality Experiment

I’ve been reading the latest blogs by Steve Pavlina (www.stevepavlina.com), a very popular personal development blogger. He’s talking about his 30-day trial into Subjective Reality. You have objective reality, where the universe exists and your consciousness arises within it, and then you have subjective reality, where your consciousness exists and that’s all. You create everything around you: the coffee that you buy at Starbucks, the annoying co-worker, the traffic jam, and even the ants crawling on the sidewalk. They are all creations of your consciousness.

It’s a radical departure from the way most people see life and live life. We have a collective belief that the world is a fixed framework and we are beings born into this environment. We claw and fight our way through life because, in objective reality, you don’t really control anything. The ways and whims of the world are forces beyond your command, and you simply do your best to deal and keep up. In objective reality there are divisions of people, schools of different thought, and “the other side”. You are separate from the world, merely existing, sometimes observing, sometimes responding, but never becoming one with the environment around you. How could you? It was here before you, and will be here when you are gone.

In subjective reality, all this changes. There was no world before your consciousness illuminated since you are the creator of your world. There is no traffic jam or annoying co-worker – these are reflections of you. As Steve explains, seeing life as subjective reality is like having a dream. You are both the dreamer and the creator of the dream, and all the characters in the dream are creations of you.

Objective and subjective reality are two perspectives in which to see life. There’s no way to really ascertain if one is the truth and the other a falsity. But when you have a choice of perspectives, it’s key to be able to see and experience all of them, because it enriches your life in unexpected ways.

I’ve been inspired by Steve to do my own experiment into subjective reality and live my life for 30 days with the constant reminder that everything I encounter is a reflection of me. This includes people, circumstances, events large and small, and so on – everything. I’m going to report on my discoveries about once per week and share my revelations or frustrations with you. I’m not sure what to expect since I, like most people, have been living life as though I am not in full control of my world. So, here goes…

08/10/2010: COCONUT JUICE FOR RECYCLING MAN

I just heard the recycling truck pull up, and, instead of ignoring the man who’s working hard to pick up my junk every two weeks and save it from the landfill like I usually do, I decided to bring him a cold can of fresh coconut juice. I gave him the drink and thanked him for working so hard. Was it weird to applaud the recycling man? Maybe. But in the end, it was me that I sent gratitude to, since he’s just a creation of myself. And I do like a cold coconut juice on a hot day.

08/09/2010: VINDICTIVE NEIGHBORS SUCK

My wife and I started a weekly community yoga class at our neighborhood clubhouse a few weeks ago. We went to the homeowners meeting, proposed the project and got approval to post signs around the complex. After the second class, a horribly vindictive and crabby neighbor decided to tear down our signs. We got very upset over this.

I finally ran into the petty thief, a resident of the community who spouted claims that we were defacing the neighborhood and sullying its beauty with our adverts. I countered back that we intended only to bring a healthy weekly activity to the community. Outwardly I beamed diplomacy and good motives. Inwardly I wanted to wring her neck.

For the next few days I replayed various scenarios in my head of how I could scare her just enough to pack her bags and move out of the complex. Her vindictiveness became mine and the cycle of inner aggression began to play out its ugly dance.

I was living in the objective world where she, a dirt bag, was separate from me and doing something to hinder me, hurt me, put sticks in my spokes. But when I switched on the subjective reality filter, then I saw that she IS me and represents a part of me that is vindictive, disrespectful, and petty. I wish this filter was only rose colored, but as it is, it reveals the ugly truth very quickly.

Since she is me, I couldn’t remain angry at her or lay voodoo curses on her every time I walked passed her house. It would be like insulting myself or wishing harm done to myself so I stopped very quickly. Then my wife and I sent silent prayers to her by saying “I’m sorry, I love you.” Sorry for the pain and suffering in her (in me) that gives rise to vindictive aggression, and love to hasten the necessary healing that needs to take place in her (in me).

I haven’t seen her again, but I’m looking forward to seeing what kind of interaction we’ll have this time.

08/08/2010: ATTACK OF THE ANTS

I know it makes some sense to see reflections of you in other people (recall the various proverbs – the eyes are the mirrors of the soul?) but would you be able to see yourself in non-human life forms, like ants?

We’ve been having an ant infestation lately and I’ve been the crazy ant killer. I crush them with glee when they crawl on my kitchen sink and I stomp them with delight when they cross my front patio. It’s a killing party.

The other morning, when I woke up and saw them attacking a little chunk of watermelon in my kitchen, I nearly exploded into a fury of ant termination when I reminded myself of my experiment. I asked myself, what part of me do the ants represent? As ridiculous as that sounds, I discovered an answer.

My wife Jaime and I talked about how the ants came because we didn’t always do the dishes right away and left them in the sink overnight. I’m clean but not a tidiness freak, so I’ll let things get out of hand once in a while. I realized then that the ants represented parts of me that I let get out of hand.

I realized that I could pay my bills more promptly. I realized that I could update my finances more regularly. I realized that I could stay off my computer more and be more focused and productive when I’m on it. I realized that when I get in a rut and start doing things out of routine and not out of passion, I let things slide. I realized that I always need to focus on expressing my deepest passions and truest nature, so that things don’t start to slide.

Within an hour, we had come up for a game plan for the kitchen, and life. We decided to do a better job of cleaning the dishes, and to begin an active strategy to find someone or some organization to help us market and distribute our creative products – our instructional DVDs, music CDs, both of our books, and our fitness and developmental workshops. Yesterday Jaime called a few production agencies, and we’re starting to take steps towards aligning our passions and our finances.

All from a few ants. It’s only been 48 hours, but I haven’t seen them back yet. Coincidence – or just a remnant of my self that’s been heard and met with compassion and understanding?

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I’ll follow up with more observations into my 30-day experiment with subjective reality next week. If you’d rather receive my blogs (since I’ll be sending out the next few weekly) by RSS feed, sign up for a feed in the top right corner of this site. Then send me an email and let me know you’re set up with an RSS reader.

Find Alignment, Not Balance

My wife and I own and operate a yoga-fitness studio called Barefoot Sanctuary that operates out of the largest Whole Foods Market in Las Vegas. We are very lucky to partner and create a community studio space with them because we also have the opportunity to introduce very unique courses into the schedule that we wouldn’t be able to do at other studios. One of those classes is my Handstand Class.

You wouldn’t think that spending an hour on your hands would be an enticing fitness offering, but it’s become quite popular. I’ve had people from all walks, none of them acrobats, come and learn the art of inversion and staying on your hands.

Perhaps the growing success of the class is due to the benefit of getting blood to your head, or the feeling of increasing strength in your shoulders and back but I think the real draw is because it teaches you the actual meaning of finding balance in your life.

Finding balance is a common goal for anyone who is too stressed, too overworked, too tired, and too busy. There are many books and speakers who talk about how to find balance in your life and offer a multitude of tools to do so. Some work and some don’t, but the one commonality of all these tools is that they are all metaphors. They are ideas that you apply to your life by using analogies, symbols, and concepts.

When you learn to do a handstand, however, you don’t deal in concepts or metaphors. You either achieve a balanced state or you don’t. And when you don’t, you fall over. The feedback loop is instantaneous.

When I begin teaching handstands to someone who has never tried it before, I explain that learning to do handstands is not about finding balance, which kind of surprises most people. Learning to do handstands is actually about creating proper alignment.

Think of your body as being divided into three blocks. Imagine that the first block runs from your fingers to your shoulders, the second from your shoulders to your hips, and the last block from your hips to your toes. When you’re inverted in a handstand, your job is to align the blocks on top of each other.

Pretend you are five again and you are playing with a set of Lego blocks. If you put one block on top of the other but put it on the corner, then set the third block on top, again skewed on the corner, your structure might hold only if you secure it with rubber bands and nails. In other words, you’re able to build a tower but it requires additional energy and resources to make it stay.

Another note about balance – you can balance anything, regardless of its shape. Finding balance is really about finding the center of gravity of an object and manoeuvering it so that you place its center of gravity directly over its contact point on the ground. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, try to recall images of acrobats at a circus balancing spinning plates, chairs, or even other people. They are able to balance the object even if it is shaped unusually. (I’ve balanced an unfolded six-foot step ladder, a bicycle, chairs, and people on my chin.)

The lesson is that you can find balance in anything, but that doesn’t mean you want to. What you want to do, especially in proper handstand technique, is to align the body so that balance comes naturally and almost without effort. Then you are using your structure and alignment to maintain your position while using very little energy. You are strong and efficient.

In other words, learning to do a proper handstand is about aligning the three blocks by making sure that your legs are directly over your hips, your hips directly over your chest, your chest directly over your shoulders and your shoulders directly over your hands. It sounds simplistic and it is. It’s simple, but not easy.

It’s not easy at first because aligning all these body parts requires subtle contractions of muscles that you rarely use and stretching of other ligaments that you hardly ever stretch. Most people come into the class with enough strength to hold themselves upside down, but lack the subtle strength and flexibility to position their body in a straight vertical line.

When you finally achieve proper alignment, then finding balance is not really an issue. Since gravity works only in one direction, and if your body blocks are directly on top of each other, then your handstand will be balanced. It can’t and won’t go anywhere. For example, try to balance three wooden blocks when they’re stacked exactly on top of each other. There’s nothing to balance because the alignment makes it balanced.

So, back to the metaphor of life and the issue of finding balance. My suggestion is to stop finding balance in your life and to begin creating alignment instead. Just like the crazy circus acrobats, you can find balance even if your life is a whirlwind with areas that are well over-extended and others that are completely ignored. You can find balance in an out-of-balance lifestyle – it’s just that you’re going to have a work a lot harder to keep it there.

When you create alignment in your life, you begin by identifying your values. Once you know what your values are, you line up three things, just like your body: your thoughts, your actions, and your words.

Having a set of defined values is like gravity to the handstand – you have to know how to position your body relative to the force of gravity. Once you have identified your values, you now also know how to think, act, and speak to align with those values.

Again, the process is simple, but not easy. If you have a life that is chaotic and out of control, then evaluate your ability to follow through with what you say, do, or think. Maybe you don’t fulfill commitments, which breaks your alignment, and forces you to be out of balance. Maybe you smile outwardly at people and cuss inwardly at their incompetence.

Perhaps you do act with integrity but your life is still out of balance. Then consider if your values are yours truly, and if they are reflective of who you are now. Contemplate whether or not you are still living a life based on borrowed values from parents, social circles, or religion.
For example, one of my values is to help people. I remember writing this down on a piece of paper in grade four when we were asked what we wanted to do when we grew up. Since this is one of my core values, I make sure that my thoughts, actions, and words reflect this mission, which is why we have a yoga-fitness studio and I write on personal growth.
So you might not ever come to my handstand class or even try one on your own. I do recommend that you meditate on your values and evaluate your follow through. If you are aligned, then you end up being able to take on more and more work without exhausting yourself or working inefficiently. You experience abundant energy, daily passion for your life – and a sense of balance.

We Live In A World Of Trust

After 15 years of professional performing in the circus, I realize that we live in a world of trust. When I perform a high flying act, supported only by cables and carabiners, I trust that the equipment will work. When I tumble across the stage in a rapid succession of back handsprings, I trust that other artists on stage will move on time, and clear the space for me. Others trust me to catch them when I throw them into the air for a double back flip, or to correctly attach their safety lines to their harnesses 60 feet in the air. I trust myself when I light my poi on fire and spin it in rapid arcs around my body. Trust is as palpable and real as the show itself, the glue that holds together a thinly fabricated illusion of seamless choreography, characters, and story line. I am fascinated by how much we trust each other, how much we trust the machines and systems that run our lives, and how horribly denying it is to our spirit to not be able to see the bountiful sea of trust that surrounds us, bathes us, and carries us.

You don’t have to be an acrobat in a dangerous circus show to recognize that trust is everywhere. Consider, and be amazed by, the many and varied acts of trust you perform when you drive to work. First, you trust that your car will start the way it was designed – you expect that the technology inside your vehicle will work correctly, and not detonate in a massive fireball on your driveway. You calmly turn the key despite the fact that you are sitting only a few feet from a bathtub full of gasoline, and that this highly explosive fuel is forcefully funneled through a super heated engine block and deliberately ignited with an electric spark.

As you drive down the road, listening to the radio, observing the weather, reading billboards, checking voicemail, and sipping your morning coffee, be astonished it is not a regular occurrence that no one has yet jumped the yellow line, careening wildly into you in a head-on collision. Be joyful that your fellow comrades on their way to work also acknowledge that they each command a multi-ton weapon of encased metal and rubber, capable of snuffing out the life of any pedestrian nonchalantly meandering across the street – but most of the time, don’t.

And speaking of pedestrians, rejoice in the knowledge that you can cross the street because we all made an implicit agreement that red means stop, and green means go. After all, they are just random colors of the rainbow and don’t have any real meaning, except for the ones we give them.

So your successful arrival at work, or wherever you are going, depends on two things: first, that we give meaning to meaningless things, and second, that we agree to continuously agree to the meaning. What greater daily demonstration of trust is there than to see millions of people consciously stopping their vehicles of mass destruction when they see the color red? Think of the millions of lives that are saved every year by this collective nod.

And this is only the drive to work. Now look inwards and consider what happens within your body on a second-to-second basis. The miracle of life is the miracle of total, complete, and binding trust. Your lungs are expanding and contracting, your heart is beating and pumping, and your eyes are absorbing light patterns while your brain is expeditiously processing trillions of bytes of information. These occurrences happen thousands, if not millions of times a day under the veil of the autonomic nervous system, completely unconscious to your waking thoughts, dutifully performing their life supporting functions without so much of a complaint or gripe. You trust that when you wake in the morning, your blood will still be flowing through your arteries, and your intestinal tract will have processed enough of the late night cheesecake to provide energy for the start of your day. It’s a miracle to think that, at any point, this intricate fabric of interdependent systems can be so easily interrupted, and life as we know it will end.

Living is trusting and is the greatest testament that the values of trust are alive and well. The next time you hear someone, or perhaps yourself say, “I can’t trust…”, contemplate the millions of examples that occur every moment that are life supporting and not life taking. Then contemplate how simple it is to cut the thinly attached chords of trust with a benign act, like driving down the wrong side of the road, or throwing bags of trash out the window of your 10th story apartment. And why wouldn’t you? It’s faster than bringing garbage down the stairs, but you don’t because we’ve all agreed to the value of life, which is the value of trust.

You might be silently screaming that mistrust does exist and that horrible trespasses against our collective agreements do occur. People do get run over by cars, murders and wars happen, and hearts cease their vital beating. There is no doubt that the execution of the trust act is not total and all-pervading. Not everyone, or every system functions perfectly.

You may have been lied to, manipulated by, or transgressed upon somehow in the past. The sensation of boundaries crossed and opportunities stolen is weighty and sobering. It is not helpful to simply say that the past is the past because your thoughts happen in the present.

What is helpful then is to remark that your present moment is replete with miraculous illustrations of trust. The question, how to trust again, is also the question of how to live again. And living by being, not thinking, strategizing, doing, or analyzing, is the answer to living again.

Living by being is a daily practice of conscious observation. What are you observing? You are rediscovering that ordinary events that normally occur without so much of a thought are in fact stupendous examples of trust. Begin observing simple, routine acts with an open and curious mind.

When I am on stage and a fellow artist is quick enough to catch me from an accidental fall, or remembers to correctly attach my safety line to my harness, I know that we live in a world of trust. When I drive through an intersection and see all the cars stopped at their red light, or get to work without trying to dodge an oncoming truck, I know that we live in a world of trust. And when I wake in the morning and open my eyes to the sunrise or take a deep breath in, I know that we live in a world of trust.

Ideas From My Readers On How To Stay In The Moment

In response to my last newsletter called “Can’t Find Your Purpose? Find Out How” I received a ton of great letters back to my question: how do YOU stay present in the moment? Here are your insightful and wonderful responses.

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Hi Alvin,

Fantastic rolling billboards!!!!

I wish I could say that I am always able to stay in the moment.  I’m not.  But I will say that when I do accomplish being in the moment, it is incredibly powerful, and as you say “purposeful”.  One way that I have accomplished it at times, is to say to myself, “No matter what else may be calling to me, I CHOOSE to focus on this one thing and put my energy on that.”  If I am fully present with that one thing then I can accomplish more than if I allow myself to be overwhelmed with all the chaos around me.

Great writing today, Alvin!

- Carolyn

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Hey Alvin…

My name is Tamara and i work with lululemon athletica in Kelowna BC….  We met in the summer and did an amazing sacred dance class in the park.

I just want to thank you for these emails.  They always seem to arrive at about the time i need to read them.

Present in the moment…hmmmmmm.
i breathe.  slow everything down and breathe, where ever I am, and hold that one moment…and let it go. And if that doesnt’ work, I dance.  big or little, soft or funky, i move…it brings me back to my body and out of my head.

It usually works, but hey, practice makes present!

love and gratitude,
Tamara

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I stay present knowing that in this exact moment it is precisely where I am meant to be. I can fight it, live with it, embrace it, or just be in it!  Nonetheless, it’s where I am! xox
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Hi Alvin,
In response to your question on how to stay in the present moment amidst chaos,  I try to remember that every moment in our lives is like a sentence in the chapter- and ultimately – the book of our lives. We are experiencing a sequence of events that are connected with energy, and these events will SOMEWHAT shape the course of our lives.  I say somewhat, because the most important thing to remember is that our thoughts are the most powerful tools we have during chaotic times. With a positive outlook and a firm decision that we can gain strength and experience from the things that life throws our way, we can get through anything. So let’s remember to make the best of each day, no matter how chaotic,  because tomorrow is never guaranteed.

Right now many of us have lost our jobs, fore closed on homes, and feel a loss one way or another. I know that this too shall pass, and with faith and perseverance good things will come soon for us.   I choose to live each day with a smile on my face, and I hope you do as well!

Thank you,

Zahra

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As I was reading your thoughts on purpose, I realized that lately I have been just BEING & being okay with that fact. Even if I catch myself thinking about events I am planning in the future, I am more at ease with allowing my heart or mind to wander in the possibilities of the future without feeling guilt for not being more present in the here & now. I think true purpose comes in a forgiving or letting go of expectations that we give ourselves so that we clear the way of our egos in order to give to others.

-Suzanne

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I am usually very excited about whatever I am doing at that exact moment.  Focusing on the task and doing it to the best of my ability.
But I have found myself feeling guilty about NOT worrying about everything else. Such as more family time, more clients, less volunteering, more volunteering, our retirement account, savings, a neater home, turning in our car at the end of it’s lease and not replacing it, etc.

Today, I should say beginning today, I know that I am doing the right thing by living in the moment and knowing that it’s my purpose.
I lost so many family members between the age of 12 and 20.Some tragically. I always try to have a Plan A, B, C.  People ask me why are you so happy.  My response is that life is too short and you never know how long you have on this planet, so live it to the fullest today.  I take my own advice for the most part, but there is always a wee bit of guilt about not doing it alllllllllll. I’m going to try harder to ignore the “alllll feeling”.

Take care!
Kari

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I was fortunate to have found my purpose early in my life.  I came here to love.  It’s so easy and it can be done anywhere and with anyone.  Living that purpose has taken me on some very enjoyable and joy-filled experiences and also taken me to desperate and sad connections.  But I always connect in my heart to being in this moment, with this person, in front of me is the most important purpose I have in this life.  They are what I focus on and love the moment for, being in their space and sharing a connection, however that connection manifests.  It’s what I’m meant to be, love.  It’s what most resonates in my soul, in my being-ness.  A smooth running wave.  Sometimes I hit an undertow, other times, I surf it like glass.  I wouldn’t want my life to be any different.  It has such fullness and beauty.
-Lisa

What Is Your Truth?

Recently I was struggling with my business. It wasn’t a question of money, irate clients, back-logged product, or a server crash. It wasn’t angry contractors, bossy managers, or accounts payables not paid.

It was about what I was saying.

These times we live in gives us endless possibilities to “say” what we want. We have email, SMS, voice mail, faxes, cell phones, satellite phones, landlines, video conferencing, old fashioned snail mail, and, oh yeah, talking face to face.

There’s no shortage of ways to communicate.

But all those technologies are rendered useless when you don’t know what it is you want to say. Read more

Deeper Truths

As some of you may already know, I am training for my very first adventure race. What is an adventure race you ask?

Well it is a 12 hour or more trek across barren desert on a mountain bike and whatever is on your feet. The event is mixed in with bouts of swimming and kayaking. This is not a solo sport – you have team members, navigation skills, and immense strategy.

My realization that I want to share with you this week is that I fell into the trap of telling others about the adventure race because it would feed my ego. In fact, whenever I told somebody I was going to do this race, I emphasized how little I knew about it, thereby magnifying the WOW factor of actually doing it.

My dear guide Carrie and my lovely fiancee Jaime turned the mirror quickly in my face and made me ask myself, why am I doing this race? Why would I want to push myself so hard? Is it all just for momentary admiration or is there something deeper?

I realized there is greater depth in doing this race but I let ego take over for a while – like a cloud obscuring the true radiance of the sun. I realized that I really do love to explore, mountain bike and be in nature. That is the reason I am doing this race.

So… I leave you with this thought. What do you brag about, boast about, talk about repeatedly that is merely a way to reinforce your ego? Your sense of status, achievement, power? And then… what is the true motivation behind those activities? You may discover something quite sincere, quite true, yet covered by a different (and false) story.

Happy Uncoverings,
Alvin.